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9 tips to survive a lonely birthday : A survivor’s guide!

9 tips to survive a lonely birthday : A survivor’s guide!

Time is the best healer, a slow healer but everything heals over time though the scars still stay

You are having a lonely Birthday? Well, happy birthday! May all of your wishes come true and you stay positive throughout your life!

So if you are reading this, yes it was my birthday a couple of days ago… And yes no one wished me. So before we start the survivor’s guide (which is a bit too exaggerated, but you get the point) let me give you a bit of the backstory… 

So it was my birthday a couple of days ago, (I shall not be mentioning the date for obvious and upset reasons), let me rephrase that it was my 16th, my sweet 16th birthday, as some of you may call it, a couple of days ago, which to my immature brain thought it would go with pomp and splendour, but alas like my mom says” If you wish too much for something to happen then it does  not happen at all” and by that I mean, this was the most loneliest and sad birthday that I may ever encounter in my life. 

Nobody wished me, baring a very few, who are actually my claose friends, nobody did anything special for me, as Pam Beesly (from The Office) once said “ You all act like I don’t exist, and that really sucks”, and yeah it really sucks. 

I had recently been to India and as the Nigerian Government dictates, we have to spend 7 days in quarantine in a hotel, not in our houses, so that was a bummer. 

The main objective behind writing this informal, immature yet helpful (so as I think about it) article is

a) To vent out my anger, frustration and depression in a more of a passive way,
b) To actually help out other people who may face the same. (So just bear with me)

So If you have read all of that, that means you are ready for the enlightening information.

So what do you do if you are feeling deserted, left out, or just sad on your birthday? From my account and experience whatever I did in this couple of days I am going to share with you.

Disclaimer: These things may not be helpful to everyone, but I shall try my best to share equivalent tips, you all reading can work your way around it.

See Also

It’s your birthday not others!

Acceptance

lonely-birthday-acceptance
  1. First thing is “Acceptance”. Ain’t nobody got the time for a petty wish on your birthday unless you are really special to that person. That’s the thing about me, I had a really tough time accepting this fact that no one is free for you or as they claim we are always here for you. All people do is forget. So you fight your own wars, and you decide its outcome… It’s either winning or losing, that depends on you. So the first step is Acceptance.

Self love

lonely-birthday-self-love
  1. So you have accepted the fact, well then step number two is what is call “Self-Love” Everything hurts except loving yourself. The best thing you can be is by being a friend to yourself. Happy birthday to myself! Be grateful God has given you yet another chance to see and admire the beautiful world that you are living in. Because no matter what happens it’s your body and your subconscious that will be with you until your final breath. Do not make yourself, your life, your happiness dependent upon others. So take a moment to appreciate yourself, and everything around you. TRUST ME that helps.

You are the charge of your own-self!

lonely-birthday-cooking
  1. If you are into cooking like me, try preparing something different, something from another country (Of-course I couldn’t do it because of quarantine) but yeah try to vent out your anger in kneading a dough that would be unbelievably soft. Science has proven that the more you knead the more gluten it releases that helps make any dough soft. A great opportunity. So try to cook something and try to make the inhabitants of your house happy. There is no better way to a man’s heart than from his stomach.

Music heals!

lonely-birthday-music
  1. If you are into music like me, try this:
    Turn off all the lights in your room, close the curtains, put on your headphones or earphones or any auditory device, rest your head on a soft, well-fluffed pillow, turn on the A/C and cover yourself with a blanket.
    Let the music take you through, let it make you feel light in the air, and let it take you on the most magical journey ever. Because the sadder you are, the more magical the journey. Same can be applied to podcasts. In my case I did both. And it really helps

    And If you talk about genre, then that really depends on your music taste.

More stuff to heal you up!

  1. If you are a book-worm like me, hey why not take this loneliness that you are feeling and turn it into an opportunity!  Read, I say reading helps in different kinds of feelings which helps intensify the reading experience. Let me explain

    So on my 16th birthday, I was reading “Suheldev: The king who saved India” by “Amish”. The anger or frustration really intensified the feeling of patriotism and intensified each and every word when it came to war, like you could feel yourself getting highly immersed. This is a sure-fire way of keeping the thoughts away from your now occupied reading mind.
  1. Sleep… Take a long nap. I don’t think there is anything to explain about this point. We all know nothing hits better than a long, refreshing nap.
  1. Take a walk, let the breeze hit your face, let all the sorrow dissolve, because a long walk in such a day/mood really hits differently. You tend to notice things you never noticed, you tend to appreciate the silent music of the trees around you, the calming chirrups of the birds, the soft rustle of earth, and the soothing petrichor smell of the earth. This is the best one. Just put on your headphones, and take a long walk. Music and walking is a deadly combination, it is the ultimate antidote, the ultimate way to detach yourself from the rest of the world.
  1. Watch The Office (US), it is also one of the best antidotes if you want to just release your stress through laughter. The power struggle of Dwight, the dorkiness of Jim, the sweet nature of Pam, Micheal being the best boss. All in one package, because even Micheal had felt the same on his birthday, so you are easily able to relate to the show.
  1. The best is to pamper yourself, be it Netflix and Chill, be it movies, be it just reading a book, this all completely depends on how the reader perceives it and how this all affects the psychology of the person

These are the 9 steps I followed through my tough time in these couple of days. The loneliness and being miserable hasn’t really left me, but I can say it has reduced a bit. 

borthday-time-heals

Time is the best healer, a slow healer but everything heals over time though the scars still stay

Writing this kind of a genre is very new to me, for me I relate and believe a lot in Science, because I believe the world would not exist if science never existed, we are like small insignificant beings in the ways of science.

I always like to give the scientific reasoning behind every article of mine, but this, this article is very different, after every tip, neither I have given any scientific reason or any surety that it definitely works, as I said earlier, that it may not work for everyone, but it’s with a different kind of faith, a faith that not even science can explain, in what I have written this article. 

Because I am a very optimistic and jolly kind of a person, but I somehow had to release this building negative energy, which may ever prove fatal. I had to write this also to just help out someone in need. 
None of the things in my article was copied from anywhere, no references were used, no wikipedia (for the first time), because whatever I have written is purely from the soul of this body of mine. So I thank you, the reader for reading.

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